Phil Quirk 2019 Reflections
There is a famous story of Bee 1664.
Bee 1664 set out on vital mission to discover a rich source of pollen that would provide a bountiful source for his hive to turn to honey.
Bee 1664 searched and searched, relentlessly zig zagging everywhere in search of the pollen source.
Eventually Bee 1664 made an incredible new discovery finding more bountiful pollen than he could ever have imagined. On finding this, he flew a direct line back to the hive – also known colloquially as a ‘bee line’.
Once back at the hive, via the most direct route, he communicated the exact coordinates to the rest of the Bees via a complex dance which is in fact used by Bees to communicate such messages.
The entire hive set off for the bountiful source flying the most direct route. Bee 1664, however, also set off but retraced his entire initial route taking much longer and with much more effort.
Although knowing the direct way, for some unusual and unconscious reason Bee 1664 repeated his old habits.
I think often coaches have a certain amount of ‘Bee 1664’ syndrome within them?
What I mean by this is – very good at ‘showing’ the way to others, sometimes not so great at ‘applying to self’ the sage-like advice…..
I don’t consider myself different from this accusation and it’s certainly something I have become aware of in the last 6 months of 2019.
I think there are 2 main learning points from 2019 for me. Interestingly both of these contain the subjects of – money, value, time & worth.
My primary driver to do what I do is to help people – it’s never been about money (as often pointed out by more astute business friends). For the last 4 years I have prided myself on making myself ‘available’ to offer advice / mentor / guide every student I have taught – this has increasingly become challenging (more like impossible) to realistically fulfil.
Added to this over the last 5 years I have given my time for free, what I’ve learnt though is nothing is for free – every action has an equal or greater reaction. The cost of giving my time away, perhaps too easily, is I have ended up paying the debt against the time personally.
My good friend and former business partner Mark was very aware of this slightly ‘lob sided’ exchange of time & knowledge and counselled me frequently on the wiseness of giving too much away for free – in the end it devalues everything around.
I have made the decision to change this in 2020.
This doesn’t mean I won’t help when needed, or offer advice when asked, it just means it needs a little more structure. Also, perhaps more importantly there needs to be a reciprocal investment from the other side of the equation.
With this in mind I’m excited and immensely looking forward to launching my 2020 mentoring programme where I will offer much more time and energy to the coaches who want to commit themselves next year.
This cannot be for free though!!
But it will represent incredible value for those on the programme. (I’ll explain this more on the FB live tomorrow night – Monday 30th Dec)
My second reflection for 2019 is around coaches feeling ‘awkward’ or ‘guilty’ when providing the cost of their services.
It’s interesting that clients don’t mind paying for clothes, cars & fuel, expensive meals in restaurants (and tip the waiter), Beats by Dr Dre headphones and the latest MacBook Pro but then question the value of coaching.
Usually people are drawn to coaching because there is something they want to change, or holding them back – and sometimes it can be because of serious ‘stuff’ which often has been holding them back for years. Clients can often be trapped like prisoners of their past or in dread of a yet untold future.
Every coach I have taught has experienced the immense emotion when a client overcomes something like lifelong anxiety or even releasing the trauma of PTSD.
How much is this worth?
2019 was the year I finally overcame this, and it has been liberating. I now know my worth and value, and more importantly I am comfortable asking for my fee – this has only been in the final months of 2019 though.
Never underestimate the value you bring to the table and if you do it will lead to your undervaluation of your worth.
Confidence should always follow experience, but be mindful that experience, like learning, is never ending journey. Do not tie your coaching fee to your experience horizon or you might find yourself walking aimlessly in the no mans land that separates the new amateur coach to the experienced professional coach.
Bee 1664 is now upgraded.
I wish everyone a successful and prosperous 2020.